Another $35 bucks spent on health. That makes it what? Hmm about $150 YTD and it's only mid Feb. Great.. should've upped the heathcare spending account to like a grand or something. Well today was for the removal of my fatty cyst embedded on the back of my forearm. One of the many many many cycsts. Why do I have them? "Blame your father" is what my dermatologist said to me. So it's in the genes. I received the thick skin and the fat cysts tagged along. This particular cyst was a midsized one compared others in my arm. I nevered named it so I'll just refer to it as it.
Well fat cysts are for the most part invisible to others. But you can definitely feel them if you got them in the skin. You can pinch them (although my doc does not suggest that cuz it'll just make them grow bigger), you can move them.. they feel like a little soft BB in the skin. I got this huge one at the shoulder but doc did not suggest that I remove it cuz due to the size and location of the cyst, the scar will stretch and tend to get quite big.
So on with the procedure. I arrived at the office approximately 8:44 AM. I was called in to the room around 8:55 AM. I waited around and stripped down to my T-shirt of course the jeans stayed on. Doc came in and asked "Are you sure you want to do this?". Doc didn't really think removing these things were necessary cuz others can't see them and they are harmless. But I wanted the one on my forearm gone. Why? Cuz I see it and I tend to squeeze them everytime I see it. Besides, I really wanted to make sure it's not cancerous. Call me pessimistic.
The doc had me laid down on my side and have my arm facing him. Not sure why I needed to lay down for that but what the heck, it was comfy. So he first drew on me with a pen to marke the spot of the cyst. He drew a circle in blue ink pen. Now was that sanitary?
Next he took a little needle filled with some type of local numbing agent. I am too tired to look up correct spelling of anethssthics.. So numbing agent it is. He took that and gave me little shots around the target. The skin I noticed immediately puffed up a bit. Looked like a huge bug bite without the redness.
"You don't have to watch this." he said.
"Ah, I am curious on what it looks like." As I look on with the procedure.
"Cool you are going to watch." doc beamed.
I guess not a lot of patients like to watch? Not I, as long as I don't feel any pain why not?
Then he took this blue tube like thing.. and twisted it down on the mark he drew. Kinda like corkscrew, he turned and turned and that is how the top layer of skin was removed. Out came this little chunk of circular layer of skin. He snipped it off and put what was a part of me into this plastic lab cup.
Now comes the interesting part..the doc then tries to pop out the cyst but it was stubborn so in goes the scissors. Snip snip snip, and out came this yellow ball. It's very similiar to color of chicken fat, but darker. The cyst was enclosed in this type of outer flexy membrane. I was surprised how big it was compared to what I felt. Interesting. That also went into the lab cup.
The doc also cauterized the insides of the cut to minimize bleeding. I was surprised to see less blood than what I had imagined. Doc only sewed me up with 1 stitch. What's up with that? I would think at least 2.
So that was the fat cyst removal process.
I still got my original bandage on there, wondering how it will look tomorrow.
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Friday, February 17, 2006
Made Up My Mind
It's a glorious day, Feb 17, 2006. It sure didn't start out that way. Sure the sun was shining and the geese .. whatever they do.. the wind was blowing.. you get the idea. Anyways, I woke with a start, having dreamt that my energy sector stocks were tumbling and that my ROTH IRA account was now 6k less than what I started at the beginning of the month. If that doesn't jarr one from sleep I don't know what will.
So the routine begins. Roll off the bed, onto the floor, and waited for brain to wake up. Ten minutes later, I couldn't resist the curiousity so the little Dell is turned on. After verifying I have not lost my shirt off my back, the attention was turned to the fridgid whether and the depressing news of global warmer. Great... NYC and part of FL will be underwater some time within this century.
Buy land in the midwest!
I have been setting 3 alarms recently. First one goes off at 3:30 AM.. why? to get up and do work. 2nd one goes off at 7 AM. Why? Incase I slept through the 3:30 AM alarm. The last one is set to buzz at 8 AM. Why? Cuz this is the absolutely must wake up time.
Once or twice I did wake up at 3:30 to do work. Actually got more done in those hours. Away from flashing sametimes and brain numbing tv shows. I did not look foward to waking up. There's the first internal design review to go over this morning. At 8:30 AM, I was still checking out news and articles on the web. I've been doing that a lot lately. Trying to find stuff other than work to occupy my time. Doing design for these new functionalities have been like pulling out ingrown hair, all over the back. It's painful and you can't really get around to it. Then it hits me again, that feeling of being trapped and that there's little you can do. I didn't like that feeling and the thought of working on code design and developing code just makes me miserable thinking about it.
So that was it.. call it 6 year long spontaneous decision, call it a cop-out, call it finally finding the courage, whatever it is, I have made up my mind. It's time to make my exit from Big Blue. For real this time.
I was checking stock forums, but that lead to scouring the posts in Ask The Headhunter from The Motley Fool. The article Taking A Salary Cut To Change Careers had 2 analogies for the situation. A particular one, that although was not on the top of my list of cons, ever the practical one, it's always on my mind.
1 - Think of a tree. The branches of the tree represent the paths that you take. The article talks about climbing up this one particular branch and looking around you find out that this is not the direction you wanted to take or it's coming to a dead end ahead. Eventually you know you are going to have to turn around or just be stuck there up on a branch that's not leading you anywhere. So in order to do that, you have to come down, retrace your steps, prehaps start all the way over to the lowest level the trunk of the tree. But you gotta take that step before you can climb over to a new branch.
2 - The second analogy is something I can definitely relate to - Stocks!
Cut your losses early on or else the price gets costlier.
Well we are on the topic of analogies, why not bring up Who Moved My Cheese again? Yes, so there's the 3rd analogy.
3 - Someone moved the cheese from usual position in the mouse maze. One mouse decided to venture into the unknown to look for that cheese while the other just waited around to see if the cheese will come back.
Message to take away is that, yah, it's going to be rough to start over or to venture into the unfamiliar territory. But that's all part of the process to find that thing you find most rewarding.
So, what's the plan? Not 100% sure, but I will be trying my hands to get into more of the writing field. In the meantime picking up odds and ends jobs, prehaps one of those on the Stepping Stones article. Companies such as Starbucks or Whole Foods that offer medical benefits after working something like 400 hours.. avg 20 hours a week.
Something.. there will always be projects and deadlines which should've been completed yesterday. Do I feel bad that the project will be lacking some resources to finish it? A little.. but whose fault would it be if everything hinges on one person? Esp in a company as big as IBM? It would be arrogant and egocentric of me to think that the division will not be able to survive without me. Sure, they might be in a bind for couple of weeks. But they'll recover soon enough. If they don't then managment really need to think hard about relying too much or putting too much weight on a single entity. Listen to me.. entity. .. dam technical mumble jumble.
Long story short, been in IT/progamming/consulting/configuration/programming field for about 6 years now.. from co-ops to interns to corporate. Time to make a move. Got friends who got engaged, to getting married, to having baby #1, and now baby #2. After 6 years, I filled the apt full with just stuff.. most of it just paper lying around, got my instruments that I haven't learned how to play yet. That's it.. 6 years. Sure there has been good days. Most of the people I've met throughout these years have been my only source of human interaction. Work for the most part monopolized my time. My bad for letting work to take over my personal time. I didn't speak up, I didn't make a fuss and a ruckus. Stupid me, I just buried my head and tried to do the best I can. But that was just incredibly foolish of me. Six years have passed and I have not made a single stride.
I don't know how long it'll take me to find the job I am looking for, but I am looking toward the change, and I will make it.
So the routine begins. Roll off the bed, onto the floor, and waited for brain to wake up. Ten minutes later, I couldn't resist the curiousity so the little Dell is turned on. After verifying I have not lost my shirt off my back, the attention was turned to the fridgid whether and the depressing news of global warmer. Great... NYC and part of FL will be underwater some time within this century.
Buy land in the midwest!
I have been setting 3 alarms recently. First one goes off at 3:30 AM.. why? to get up and do work. 2nd one goes off at 7 AM. Why? Incase I slept through the 3:30 AM alarm. The last one is set to buzz at 8 AM. Why? Cuz this is the absolutely must wake up time.
Once or twice I did wake up at 3:30 to do work. Actually got more done in those hours. Away from flashing sametimes and brain numbing tv shows. I did not look foward to waking up. There's the first internal design review to go over this morning. At 8:30 AM, I was still checking out news and articles on the web. I've been doing that a lot lately. Trying to find stuff other than work to occupy my time. Doing design for these new functionalities have been like pulling out ingrown hair, all over the back. It's painful and you can't really get around to it. Then it hits me again, that feeling of being trapped and that there's little you can do. I didn't like that feeling and the thought of working on code design and developing code just makes me miserable thinking about it.
So that was it.. call it 6 year long spontaneous decision, call it a cop-out, call it finally finding the courage, whatever it is, I have made up my mind. It's time to make my exit from Big Blue. For real this time.
I was checking stock forums, but that lead to scouring the posts in Ask The Headhunter from The Motley Fool. The article Taking A Salary Cut To Change Careers had 2 analogies for the situation. A particular one, that although was not on the top of my list of cons, ever the practical one, it's always on my mind.
1 - Think of a tree. The branches of the tree represent the paths that you take. The article talks about climbing up this one particular branch and looking around you find out that this is not the direction you wanted to take or it's coming to a dead end ahead. Eventually you know you are going to have to turn around or just be stuck there up on a branch that's not leading you anywhere. So in order to do that, you have to come down, retrace your steps, prehaps start all the way over to the lowest level the trunk of the tree. But you gotta take that step before you can climb over to a new branch.
2 - The second analogy is something I can definitely relate to - Stocks!
Cut your losses early on or else the price gets costlier.
Well we are on the topic of analogies, why not bring up Who Moved My Cheese again? Yes, so there's the 3rd analogy.
3 - Someone moved the cheese from usual position in the mouse maze. One mouse decided to venture into the unknown to look for that cheese while the other just waited around to see if the cheese will come back.
Message to take away is that, yah, it's going to be rough to start over or to venture into the unfamiliar territory. But that's all part of the process to find that thing you find most rewarding.
So, what's the plan? Not 100% sure, but I will be trying my hands to get into more of the writing field. In the meantime picking up odds and ends jobs, prehaps one of those on the Stepping Stones article. Companies such as Starbucks or Whole Foods that offer medical benefits after working something like 400 hours.. avg 20 hours a week.
Something.. there will always be projects and deadlines which should've been completed yesterday. Do I feel bad that the project will be lacking some resources to finish it? A little.. but whose fault would it be if everything hinges on one person? Esp in a company as big as IBM? It would be arrogant and egocentric of me to think that the division will not be able to survive without me. Sure, they might be in a bind for couple of weeks. But they'll recover soon enough. If they don't then managment really need to think hard about relying too much or putting too much weight on a single entity. Listen to me.. entity. .. dam technical mumble jumble.
Long story short, been in IT/progamming/consulting/configuration/programming field for about 6 years now.. from co-ops to interns to corporate. Time to make a move. Got friends who got engaged, to getting married, to having baby #1, and now baby #2. After 6 years, I filled the apt full with just stuff.. most of it just paper lying around, got my instruments that I haven't learned how to play yet. That's it.. 6 years. Sure there has been good days. Most of the people I've met throughout these years have been my only source of human interaction. Work for the most part monopolized my time. My bad for letting work to take over my personal time. I didn't speak up, I didn't make a fuss and a ruckus. Stupid me, I just buried my head and tried to do the best I can. But that was just incredibly foolish of me. Six years have passed and I have not made a single stride.
I don't know how long it'll take me to find the job I am looking for, but I am looking toward the change, and I will make it.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
First Set Done
Thank God.. good grief.. mother #@#$$%^^!! .. *sigh*.. 2 weeks I got 1 set of documentation docs done at around 5 am 12 days later.. wonder if I can blame it on the material or the writer's block.. God... .. just have noooooo motivation to work on that thing.. it puts me asleep..
anyways.. you ever dig stuff out of your belly button? Well I hit a mine today.. bunch of little pieces of what I can tell dried crap.. yah that's a good word.. came out after much finger digging. Surprisingly it didn't stink! I remember a time where I wouldn't stick anything in my belly button for that item has to be quarantined and nuked cuz it was just vile.
Don't know what happened between then and now. No more foul odors, just dried crap. If these black brittle fragments are what is left from my umbilical cord that would be pretty neat. Disgusting, but neat. To think these nasty things I am rubbing between my fingers might have been there for roughly 29 years now... amazing.. I've always wanted to be an archeologist.. well guess it's dream come true.
Things to do before I leave this planet:
archeologist - done
anyways.. you ever dig stuff out of your belly button? Well I hit a mine today.. bunch of little pieces of what I can tell dried crap.. yah that's a good word.. came out after much finger digging. Surprisingly it didn't stink! I remember a time where I wouldn't stick anything in my belly button for that item has to be quarantined and nuked cuz it was just vile.
Don't know what happened between then and now. No more foul odors, just dried crap. If these black brittle fragments are what is left from my umbilical cord that would be pretty neat. Disgusting, but neat. To think these nasty things I am rubbing between my fingers might have been there for roughly 29 years now... amazing.. I've always wanted to be an archeologist.. well guess it's dream come true.
Things to do before I leave this planet:
Saturday, February 11, 2006
Let the Games Begin!
Just finished watching the opening ceremony for the 2006 winter Olympics in Torino. This opening ceremony was a bit of a contrast from Athens. While Greece had put on a very well orchestrated artistic show that inspired many "woes!" from everyone around the world, Torino presented the ceremony in more of a casual fun light hearted way. The focal point with this Olympics ceremony for Italy was clever choreography and people power. My favorite part was when probably hundres of performers lined up and formed the shape of a giant skier and shown in sort of a Lego/claymation type of a way. Then through change of formation, we saw through aerial shots the giant skier's downhill ski trip. It was utterly brilliant and fun and engaging to watch.
Couple of things surprised me. The use of 80's American music throughout most of the opening ceremony and the use of American performer Peter Gabriel. Yes he was singing song of peace, I guess it's more of the message that counts. But what about Italian performers singing in English?
Cool... let the games begin, only if we can all play along in the bigger world. But then the specials won't be that special anymore right? Maybe it'll be even better like how Monday Night football draws a crowd and that's only national.
Anyways.. down to business:
Worst dressed = China
- what the @#$? what they wearing!! It looked like they just got out of the midnight shift from Intel's factory with their shapeless, unflattering, white lab coats. Man they were fugly! What the heck...who is picking all this Olympic merchandis for them? First it was the fugly, demon looking, scarier than tellatubee things.. for the Beijin Olympics .. .now the lab coats/white garbage bags? I really hope they acquire a better taste by 2008. Asians have been making clothing for thousands of years, even if they didn't want to show off the traditional patterns I am sure there's a design better than the white blunt cut.
Coolest sporty jackets = Germany
- now those are some nice looking, refreshing jackets, in colorful green and orange mixes.. thumbs up
Chic casual jackets = Slovenia
- I want one!! the offwhite trench coat like jackets paired with an apple green scarf.. very very classy and slick.. nice..
Hahah.. I am not the only one who thought Solenvia's outfit rocked!.. found this funny commentary blog on the fashion show we witnessed at Torino this year. Wonder where I can buy one..
Comments on 2006 Winter Olympic Opening Ceremony
Couple of things surprised me. The use of 80's American music throughout most of the opening ceremony and the use of American performer Peter Gabriel. Yes he was singing song of peace, I guess it's more of the message that counts. But what about Italian performers singing in English?
Cool... let the games begin, only if we can all play along in the bigger world. But then the specials won't be that special anymore right? Maybe it'll be even better like how Monday Night football draws a crowd and that's only national.
Anyways.. down to business:
Worst dressed = China
- what the @#$? what they wearing!! It looked like they just got out of the midnight shift from Intel's factory with their shapeless, unflattering, white lab coats. Man they were fugly! What the heck...who is picking all this Olympic merchandis for them? First it was the fugly, demon looking, scarier than tellatubee things.. for the Beijin Olympics .. .now the lab coats/white garbage bags? I really hope they acquire a better taste by 2008. Asians have been making clothing for thousands of years, even if they didn't want to show off the traditional patterns I am sure there's a design better than the white blunt cut.
Coolest sporty jackets = Germany
- now those are some nice looking, refreshing jackets, in colorful green and orange mixes.. thumbs up
Chic casual jackets = Slovenia
- I want one!! the offwhite trench coat like jackets paired with an apple green scarf.. very very classy and slick.. nice..
Hahah.. I am not the only one who thought Solenvia's outfit rocked!.. found this funny commentary blog on the fashion show we witnessed at Torino this year. Wonder where I can buy one..
Comments on 2006 Winter Olympic Opening Ceremony
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Stocks and Work
How does one judge productivity? Am I being productive when instead of work I am busy learning about stocks trying to make money? Or is that just slacking off at work? Probably the latter. But can you blame me? Come on.. it's doing documentation or looking at the little nice tickers go up and down.. red.. green... red again.. green green green... red.... it's like Christmas all over again!
I was dumped into the design/documentation/implementation project about 2 weeks ago. The first set of tasks is to document all the stuff we need to get into the next release of the product. Well, after being on the fast pace demo team for about a year, getting back to technical writing proved to be a bit difficult for my mind and body to get acclimated. Having an active stock market doesn't help either. My mind wanders to stocks. I dream about the opening bell and the first 10 minutes after it, with all the crazy trading. I see stocks drop 10 dollars and I wake rushing to turn on my desktop, ready and eager to get in on bargains.
And oh yah.. work.. suppose to talk about my procrastination problem. Where was I? So 2 weeks later.. the huge design doc is due tomorrow. How much do I have done? ehh.. i say maybe 40 percent if even. Everytime I look at that thing it makes me yawn and the eyes turn filmy.. and my bed beckons me.
It's my job (for now) so I must do whatever it takes.... gawd... my ass is numb.. maybe some exercise will help. Doubt it.
I was dumped into the design/documentation/implementation project about 2 weeks ago. The first set of tasks is to document all the stuff we need to get into the next release of the product. Well, after being on the fast pace demo team for about a year, getting back to technical writing proved to be a bit difficult for my mind and body to get acclimated. Having an active stock market doesn't help either. My mind wanders to stocks. I dream about the opening bell and the first 10 minutes after it, with all the crazy trading. I see stocks drop 10 dollars and I wake rushing to turn on my desktop, ready and eager to get in on bargains.
And oh yah.. work.. suppose to talk about my procrastination problem. Where was I? So 2 weeks later.. the huge design doc is due tomorrow. How much do I have done? ehh.. i say maybe 40 percent if even. Everytime I look at that thing it makes me yawn and the eyes turn filmy.. and my bed beckons me.
It's my job (for now) so I must do whatever it takes.... gawd... my ass is numb.. maybe some exercise will help. Doubt it.
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